“Self-esteem is a huge piece of my work. You have to believe it’s possible and believe in yourself. Because after you’ve decided what you want, you have to believe it’s possible, and possible for you, not just for other people. Then you need to seek out models, mentors, and coaches.”
— Jack Canfield

Do you ever feel like you are working so hard to please everyone around you that you lose yourself in their expectations? It is sort of like fitting our lives into little boxes. There may just be one box. Or there may be many boxes… which can really tire you out at the end of the day.

What do I mean by a box? Take each relationship you have or situation in your life and see if you are being your authentic self with them or if you are squeezing yourself in (or trying to squeeze yourself out) of a belief system that is not yours.

It can relate to any part of your life, your career (I am a team-player that likes everyone I work with), your family (I am a super-mom that can do it all), your romantic relationships (I am a passionate lover).

These are all fine… great even, if they are truly you. What if you like working more independently? What if you need help from the rest of the family to get everything done? What if you are too tired at the end of the day to be passionate all the time?

It’s up to you to stay in the box or to feel free to move around and enjoy life as you are…

“Think of cause and effect like watching a video. Imagine that you rented a video, and it was terrible. You just hated it! Would you take a hammer and smash your television or would you change the video tape? If you smashed the screen, you would be dealing with effect. If you changed the video, you would be dealing with cause.” — James Arthur Ray

How many things in our life we attempt to change at the “effect” level of being instead of the “causal” level?

What does this mean really? Well, a lot of it has to do with our thoughts to begin with. What are we focusing on when we want to create change? Are we thinking of the undesired outcome? Or are we focusing on what we want?

It’s like wanting to move to a new apartment that has no cockroaches, no loud neighbors, and is not expensive. When really what we want is a clean apartment with good neighbors, and affordable rent.

Here’s a bit of “tough love” for you. I am simply going to quote Dr. Robert Anthony completely for today’s inspiration because he says it so well.

“If you feel that you were off to a good start but are currently stalled, you need to admit to yourself that you have probably slipped back into your comfort zone.

More than likely you have been deceiving yourself that you are making progress, but at the same time you are really not getting anywhere.

What you need to do is take action. Even if it is a very small action.

Nothing you can tell yourself, nothing you can say to others, nothing you can think or feel or imagine is going to get you out of the mental bog you’re mired in.

The only thing that can rescue you is - to take that next step.

Maybe you know what that is. If you know exactly what it is, DO IT!

If you don’t know, or aren’t sure, allow you intuition to guide you. Do whatever you feel compelled to do, but do it NOW to get yourself going again — even if it means entering. . .

. . . your discomfort zone.

– Dr. Robert Anthony

“In order to grow spiritually, feelings must be communicated. Otherwise, they build up inside and the energy gets denser and lower, denser and lower, until a person is only half-conscious.”
— Marian Eileen Charlton, Life on the Causal Plane, A Glimpse of Heaven

Have you ever had something or someone really bother you, but instead of dealing with the issue, you let it slide by? It could be because you don’t like confrontation. It could be out of politeness that you don’t want to voice it. Whatever the reason, you feel it is better left unsaid. Then something else adds to the pile. Then something else. Before you know it you are full of these past issues and you don’t even know why you are feeling so terrible.

What’s worse is that by this time the slightest irritating thing will, out of the blue, make you either explode or bring you into complete depression. One person explained it to me by comparing it to a bucket. Eventually the bucket gets full and when things keep getting added to it they begin to overflow.

By expressing your feelings you can actually help yourself to heal. Honor yourself and your health by living through honest communication. Just remember to communicate your feelings to the right person — it’s not about taking it out on innocent bystanders either. And you don’t have to be nasty about the things that bug you or get you down. But being honest with others is also being honest to yourself.

“The ancient Greek definition of happiness was the full use of your powers along lines of excellence.”
— John F. Kennedy, (1917 - 1963)

Take control of your life by finding exactly what you are passionate about and living it in excellence right this very moment. When we allow ourselves to live each day to its fullest, our appreciation and gratitude for life increases.

Find the joy in the moments of life and have passion for what you do every day. This is our only opportunity to live today and express ourselves to our fullest potential.

Don’t keep waiting, wondering, and wishing. Your life is in your hands. What do you want to do with it?

“Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.”
— Albert Schweitzer, (1875-1965)

Sometimes, no matter how much you want to change, change just seems to evade you. Perhaps it is willpower. Perhaps deep down, even subconsciously, you do not feel worthy of improvement, happiness, or success. Whatever the reason, something diverts you from your goals and change does not occur. What can you do then?

If becoming the best you can be for yourself just doesn’t inspire you to succeed, then dedicate your change or improvement to someone else and do it for them. Find someone who can use a positive role model and who would benefit from seeing you take yourself and your life to the next level. They don’t need to know that you are doing this for them. But keep that person, or group of people, in mind as you check your progress on a daily basis.

On your way to success you will be an inspiring example teaching others that they too can do the same as you.

“If we take care of the moments, the years will take care of themselves.”
— Maria Edgeworth, O Magazine, April 2004

Think back over the last week. How many moments were significant enough that you will remember them right now, or in a week, or in a month, a year, or even five years from now? Most of the time we are so busy surviving life that we let each moment slip by relatively unnoticed. In this rushed pace of living we also tend to take the people in our lives for granted, forget why we are really doing what we are doing, and don’t even sacrifice a moment of time to be thankful for all that we have right now, right here in front of us.

Time is a precious gift. Start living every moment in a more conscious light and you will begin to see how ordinary moments in your life are truly extraordinary. When you discover a particular moment in time that you want to treasure for years to come, stop and truly take it in. Allow yourself to stay in the experience, even just mentally, for a little longer than usual to notice what is so special about the moment. Soon you will be well on your way to building a mountain of wonderful memories of all the special moments in your life.

“There is no stress in the world, only people thinking stressful thoughts and then acting on them.”
— Dr. Wayne Dyer

Misery is not supposed to be the norm of life. Take out the stress and drama in your life and you will see that it is actually all good and can even be fun. Joy and love is what you are truly all about. It is the natural state of your being. Allow yourself to be the true you and see what a difference it will make everyday in every aspect of your life.

It doesn’t matter what you are doing — work, school, daily chores — have fun with it by adding a smile or laugh. Spread the joy of life around you to others who have forgotten that life is supposed to be fun. See even the most mundane of tasks for what for what it is — a stepping stone on your journey to the greatest life for you.

“Man improves himself as he follows his path; if he stands still, waiting to improve before he makes a decision, he’ll never move.” — Paulo Coelho

Indecision, procrastination, creative block, laziness; it doesn’t matter what you want to call it, it all amounts to the same thing — nothing gets accomplished. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I understand fully what it’s all about. I’ve been there before plenty of times myself. I have used many excuses — some more legitimate than others — for not moving forward.

But there comes a moment when you have to realize and tell yourself (because for some reason it usually doesn’t work when someone else tells you) that if you just keep waiting for that something to happen, or that idea to come, or hey what about maybe just winning a lottery instead, you will never actually move forward in your life.

As simple and yet as difficult as it may seem, the best course of action when you come to inaction is ACTION. As you move along your path you will either stumble upon the missing pieces or they will find you along the way. The main thing is you are always improving if you keep moving forward because there is always something to learn along the way.

“When we feel great about who we are, we radiate an undeniable magnetic energy that attracts to us all the things we desire.”
—Debbie Ford, The Best Year of Your LIfe

Having high self-esteem is probably the most important requirement in achieving success, obtaining what you want in life, and simply living the best life you could possibly live. Too often we are lead to believe that we can feel good or better by obtaining things outside ourselves — money, status, respect from others. This often means we neglect and minimize the importance of how we feel inside.

As long as we continue to feel shame, judgment, doubt about who we are, happiness and success will not find their ways to us as we run around trying to fill the void with things outside ourselves. When we have the courage to love and respect who we are, both perfect and imperfect, we automatically feel deserving enough to have it all.